Tag Archive for saving a relationship

Not the Language of Love…

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Warning: If you are offended by language, profanity or open discussion about sex, love and/or relationships, read no farther. This article is possibly not for you. If you have ever tried to ban something, or participated in such a ban, stop reading now! This post is not for anyone who is intellectually bankrupt or has no capacity or will to advance a conversation either in public or private. Again, if you are easily offended, STOP READING NOW!!!!!!!!

 

Not the Language of Love…

With that said, let’s get to the heart of the matter. My post today was originally planned to open a conversation around sexual relationships and how we need not be frightened to use the language we have so graciously been provided. Instead, I must address not only this but, the growing ignorance regarding the restraint and now censorship of language itself.

 

I would like to thank Jay Simcic for his post from yesterday. I will not cover the post, you may via the provided link, and I suggest you do so. His point is timely and well taken.

Source: Fifty Shades Of Grey Banned

We have evolved to a societal apex of enlightened stupidity. Who the hell is in charge of anything in Brevard County, Florida? Way to go dumbasses! You attempted to ban 2 Live Crew. You got a federal judge to rule in favor of the lyrics being obscene. The album and the band were launched into stardom by your intolerance and ignorance. Then, to add insult to injury, the ruling was overturned by a federal appeals court. Free publicity for the band, tax dollars spent for no reason and all you got, to quote Bill Engvall, “Here’s you sign”.

I hope you didn’t rid yourselves of the first sign, because with the removal of the book “50 Shades of Grey” from your libraries, you may just need it. I don’t think there will be litigation, but look at the publicity your stupidity is providing both your county and the book. The book isn’t the issue as much as possibly the education system. Who teaches hate, intolerance, and ignorance on this scale? This must be the Ivy League of stupidity.

Where are we today when we engage one another? Do we intentionally hide behind some false moral code in order to hide our feelings and thoughts? In my opinion, yes.

If you don’t like a band, don’t buy or listen to their music. If you don’t like a book, don’t read it. If you don’t like a movie (The Last Temptation of Christ), don’t drive from your home, don’t withdraw the amount of money required for a ticket from your wallet, don’t buy the ticket and don’t watch the movie.

Radio stations, talk show hosts, television programs, music, movies, art, books, they are all either a form of expression or a medium of such. Banning any part or person destroys the public forum of communicating with each other.

I get that not everything is appropriate for all ages. I get that not everything is appropriate for all places. But to stifle the conversation without regard for anyone but a few mental midgets is counter productive on a universal scale.

Now, for the REAL Conversation

My point for today is the open discussion of sex and sexuality. I want to put the forum in perspective before I write another post so that WE (YOU, ME, US) can have a discussion. Nothing more than people sharing in an open conversation without fear, suppression or concern. That’s where I am today and I want you to join me.

Interested? I hope so. Everything we have, everything we do and everything we share is done through language. You are reading this now because of language. You speak to another because of language. We tell others that we love them because of language. We communicate everything, anything and nothing because of language. And above all, I refuse to allow it to be suppressed or killed off. Join me, PLEASE!

I will not promise to be acceptable. I will not promise to be politically correct. I will not promise to keep it safe for work. But I will promise to communicate and provide open dialog regarding sex, relationships and love as I know it.

Join me or screw off, I don’t care. But, if you’ve read this far, what are you thinking?

We are about to embark on a very interesting journey, a clearing house of conversation and ideas, sharing interests and desires. If you don’t have the stomach for it, so be it. But don’t be surprised when the secrets you keep become the poison that kills your relationship.

What is Taboo?

Sex is not taboo. Learning about sex in a healthy manner is not taboo. We used to teach it in school. Having sex is not taboo, but suppressing discussion based on fear and ignorance certainly should be.

In my up coming book all of this is discussed in detail and we reveal why we share and don’t share information about sex with each other or our children. The reasons are clear and well defined, yet we are afraid of what we don’t know. So let’s dig in and get with it and above all, have fun within the discussion.

Next week I will get back to the point I wanted to cover today. It is dirty, profane and possibly vulgar, but we are talking about sex. Let’s get dirty with it.

So be Forewarned: If Words Scare YOU, Avoid My Posts in the Future.

I will be challenging each of you to get involved in the conversation. Get your families involved, get your friends involved, get your lovers involved, but get involved.

Does the word vagina make you uncomfortable or excited? Does the word penis make you cringe with fear or bring you to erotic thought? There is your homework assignment for next week. If you can’t handle these words, you better hang on to your ass next week.

Until then, please leave me a comment. Love it, hate it, but talk about it. Invite me into your would and I will share mine, but don’t back off now we are only getting started.

Love with no shame and ask with no fear.

Bobby

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Saving A Relationship – 3 Ways To Make Your Relationship Work

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If you have looked online for love relationship advice you have probably come across some really bad ideas. Sometimes some even pretty good ideas actually miss the point. While it may be fine to bring your partner flowers or swoop them off for a weekend retreat, the real point of a relationship is the develop an intimate connection together, not see how many trips you can go on. The good news is that you can still begin right now working on your relationship, and the solutions frequently do not even cost a dime.

3 Pieces of Love Relationship Advice that Work

Begin with Respect – While there are many elements necessary to build and maintain a good, strong relationship, you must realize that without respect, you really do not have much of a relationship to save. Sometimes, when you spend so much time with a person, you forget to afford each other the simple respect that you would give to any stranger.

How do you fix this? Simply put, behave differently. A good way to help retrain yourself is to think of someone who you respect so much that they even intimidate you a little. Then when you are speaking with your partner do not say anything to them that you would not say to the person whom you admire. One stupid statement can be the beginning of the end, so be careful.

Offer Your Support – If you really respect each other, then you will naturally support each other. When your partner is excited about something, share in the excitement. As they share their dreams and goals with you, offer them positive support, and help them where you can.

If your partner asks you to look critically at what they are doing and offer your opinion, then feel free to do so, but only in a constructive way. So it is fine to find a flaw with their plan as long as you can justify your thoughts. So be thoughtful before you voice your opinion, and if you are not sure what you think, just support them in their efforts.

Pick your Battles – Of course there are going to be times that your partner gets on your nerves, and there are going to be things that you do that get on their nerves, but guess what? You are probably bugging them right back. You do not want to nag your partner or always be negative. Instead, learn to be tolerant.

Whether you are in a new relationship or have been in the same one for years, some things will never change. You will always need to be a little tolerant, show your support and respect your mate for a relationship to work well. So as you are looking for good love relationship advice you may want to simply listen to your own common sense instead.

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Save This Marriage Using 4 Simple Strategies

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Save This Marriage Using 4 Simple Strategies

While saving a marriage may not be impossible, it is really hard to do it by yourself. When your spouse has one foot out the door, it may seem like any chance of rescuing your relationship is over. If you just maintain a cool head, you will give yourself a chance to find some options to offer your spouse for rethinking their position. By using these strategies, you may be able to bring your spouse around to your way of thinking, and that may be all it takes to redirect your energy as a couple in a positive direction.

The Elements Needed to Save a Marriage

Act As If – Many studies have been conducted which show that how we act actually dictates how we feel. If you feel sad, and you make yourself take a posture of being happy, you will begin to actually feel happy. So if you act like you are a happy couple, you will begin to feel like a happy couple. That does not mean that all of your problems will simply melt away, but it does mean that you are stacking the deck in your favor to help you both remember why you fell in love in the first place. Being happy causes you to remember the good times, and that continues the blissful cycle.

Be Patient – You may want your spouse to behave differently or join you in counseling. If they are not ready to try these things just yet, do not hound them. Begging and threatening are much more apt to cause additional problems rather than fix anything. Ask gently, and ask often. Try not to judge your spouse because they do not move at the same pace that you do. They are processing the problems that you are having as a couple, and maybe what they need for a fix is not what you need for a fix. If you are both genuinely trying to save your marriage, then give them the space to come to their own decisions. Respect their boundaries and keep offering them the opportunity to try new things or to join you in counseling.

Deal with the Issues – If your spouse was at the brink of leaving, then your marriage has problems. So just because he is staying, do not pretend that the problems do not exist. If you do, you will simply be watching them leave another day. Take this opportunity to find out where the problems are in your relationship and fix them. There are a myriad of problems that drive people apart, but if you both genuinely want to work out whatever the problem for your relationship is, you will find a way. If you find that you are stuck, then enlist the help of a counselor. Otherwise, listen to each other, and if you put each other’s needs in front of your own, you may naturally find your fix.

Maintenance – Just because you are having problems in your marriage does not mean that the world stops. You still have a family to care for, work to attend to and other obligations that are outstanding. So it is really to get beaten down when you are dealing with marital problems. Make sure that you look after yourself, so that you have the mental acuity and energy to deal with everything on your plate. You need to eat, sleep and exercise so that you are healthy and can relieve any built up stress. By taking care of your needs, you will be able to solve your problems more effectively as well.

Once your spouse has thrown in the towel on your marriage, it can be difficult to turn things around, but it is possible to do. Try to stay positive and calm, and let your spouse know that you want to try to repair your relationship. By offering some room for your spouse to express their frustrations, it is possible to save a marriage. You may need to enlist the help of a professional, or you my find your way back to happiness on your own. The important thing is that you try.

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How To Overcome Communication Problems In Relationships

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If you want to even begin thinking of saving a relationship the first place you should start is on your communication with your partner. If you’re not communicating that’s not a good thing. Here are a few tips for you to try to overcome your communcation problems in relationships and start saving your relationship

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